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Written by: Golem

Read by: Wasuki

Special guest star Spicoli plays the part of Sean Penn.

~In Casa Azul's laundry room...~

Big Bull: Here's how it goes down: Waffle... Waffle... Waflutter?

Flutter's Rival: I'm Flutter's Rival.

Big Bull: Right. Flutter's Rival, you'll chuck your trusted keyboard at RealGTX's shoelaces. His shoelace mites will be powerless to defend themselves. Then, whip out your new Dvorak's Keyboard (http://www.mwbrooks.com/dvorak/layout.html), which has been soaking in Palmolive since 1320 AD.

WarealGTX: That's CE.

Big Bull: I told you already, we don't live in an alternate dimension.
Anyway, Suki, you get the DVDs. Make sure they're really flat, and when we confront our good counterparts, make the DVDs sing and dance.

Suki: Right.

Big Bull: Everyone else, know your ABC's and play it by ear. Let's roll out!

~Setting: Ridgemont High, 1320 AD/CE~

Dvorak: I have finally created the ergonometrically perfect dance pad for use with Dance Dance Revolution!

QWERTY: That dance pad is nothing compared to my new jamless keyboard!

Dvorak: Confrontation!

~Setting: Ridgemont High bridge, present~

Name: Dishwashing liquid breach in sector 4!

Nametag: What?!

Name: Main screen turn on.

~Something turns on. Maybe it's a blender. Something that would be a main screen.~

NES Zapper: That's serious. We'd better call in... the stunt doubles.

~So the stunt doubles venture to sector 4, where Palmolive dribbles along the floor and they face a door. Name and Nametag try to open the door, but it doesn't budge. NES Zapper shoots an opening in the door, and Palmolive shoots out, effectively cleaning all dishes in its path.

Elsewhere, in sunny yet abandoned Somewheresville, the Pencil Shaving Shoe Mobile rides over areas marked with massive letters written in the ground...~

RealGTX the Guy who Talks: 'P, Y, F, G, C?! What kind of place is this?!

Fire Mario: I'm afraid this is a... Dvorak keyboard!!

Everybody else: Dvorak keyboard?!

OnStar: Divora keyblah?

Wasuki: Shut up! Nobody likes GPSes.

~Fire Mario and the OnStar go into a war zone and free the hostages.

Back in the car...~

Golem: What's that up ahead...?

~Golem points up ahead, where a Pen Shaving Shoe Mobile is barked. I mean parked.~

RealGTX: Flutter, stop the car! ~the car stops~ I'll go and check it out.

~RealGTX hops out through the windshield, creating some really sharp things. Before he knows it, the keyboard of Flutter's Rival hits his shoelaces and falls to the side.~

RealGTX: Geez, my shoelace mites!! Why, whoever threw that is gonna--~looks up to find Flutter's Rival two yards away~--pay!

~Flutter hops out of the Pencil Shaving Shoe Mobile through the anti-lock brake.~

Flutter: Hold on, 'GTX. I'll handle this.
Booooeeeeoooeoeoeoeoeoeoeoeo!

Flutter's Rival: Foolish Plinko gamepiece!

Big Bull: His Rival! Where's your Dvorak keyboard?!

Flutter's Rival: Uhhh...

~Meanwhile, in sector 4 of Ridgemont High...~

Flutter's Rival: ~swimming in Palmolive~ It's right here!

Big Bull: ~also swimming in Palmolive~ You idiot, we're in the last scene.

Flutter's Rival: ...Wait a minute...

Big Bull: We're fighting our good counterparts.

Flutter's Rival: Oh geez.

Big Bull: ~slaps forehead~

Name: Hey look, it's that guy who lives in all the breakfast cereal boxes!

Nametag: Say "cheese"! ~takes out a camera and aims it at Flutter's Rival and Big Bull~

Flutter's Rival and Big Bull: Cheeeese!

~Nametag clicks his camera and the lense falls off into the Palmolive while the light flashes on him instead of Flutter's Rival and Big Bull.~

Nametag: Like it? It's from Ikea, I built it myself.

The Bored Page Movie 3 Home!

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