Nintendo Fans: Cat Investigations, Part 1
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Cat Investigations
Part 1

 

Written by Luigigamer Golem, Raakone, and Nintenfreak (in order of first post).

Leonard Nemoy walks into view from the side. He is in Sunday afternoon attire and is against a plain black wall.

"Futures are ever-expansive. Well, duh, that's a given." He rolls his eyes.

"Anyhow, if one peers into the future, there is a very large chance that it is highly inacurate. Every atom that moves the tiniest bit could make worlds of difference.

Still, isn't it fun to look? :)

Greg, who used to be better known as 'Golem,' now works not as a plumber, but as an investigator. Not in the regular sense, however.

You see, not just the normal are among him and his world...

Even Greg is out of the normal himself. Exposure to the effects of time travelling with the Time And Space Travelling System created by Shigeru Miyamoto (fanboy god also from your 1990's) and the imminent coming of puberty mixed with his psyche and reshaped him into a muscular male as opposed to his scrawny body. He was dubbed 'Cat.' He eventually controlled himself and returned to his normal self, but not losing his muscle. After a suicide attempt, 'Cat' became much a mix of himself and 'Golem' the bony. He's worked to subdue the evil that is abnormal while helping all those that are hurt by the evil abnormal, including the good of those atypical.

Now that you've met who it's named after, you'll see who started it all. This is where things come into place.

A supposedly unrelated event (which will soon be determined to not be as unrelated as thought) soon transpired, or will transpire soon, or may not even happen, depending on which dimension, sub-dimension, point-in-space-tim, and vectoral-fluctuation you are current inhabiting. Despite this roundabout and convoluted explanation, it should be noted that future events such as these will effect you in the future...assuming it is your future. But the important thing is that it is the future of Cat Investigations.
In the city of Sayamura, in a subway station on the Yellow Line, a strange blue rock appeared on a bench on the platform between tracks 3 and 4 of said station. This blue rock, vaguely resembling a cross between granite and sandstone, but bright blue and shiny, seemed insignificant. The next day a few more of these rocks appeared, and oddly they all appeared during the period that the station is closed. Passengers who walked between any two or more rocks reported hearing "strange voices", and in several cases, having headaches. The rocks were all removed and placed into a nearby Dumpster, the handler of said rocks was left with a weird tingling feeling in his hands. The next day more rocks had appeared, some in the same place as removed rocks. Service was disrupted several times due to people experiencing headaches, convulsions, grand mal seizures, petit mal seizures, moyen mal seizures, pas mal seizures, presque mal seizures, hallucinations, and overwelming desires to join all Cults who Trademark Their Names to Better Rip Off Your Money. It had become so bad that all trains were instructed not to stop at that station any more, the doors were sealed, and men in cleansuits removed the rocks. Security guards were placed everywhere. Surprisingly, MORE rocks appeared the next day, and this time they had a stronger glow. The Subway drivers swore they heard strange voices, mentioning something of "We are the Afava'a, we are returning, we shall comeback, we will not be denied, we will not be stopped." All of them were given two day sick-leave. The transportation agency scrambled to get all the replacement drivers in time for the next day. The next day, however, the entire station was blue, despite all of the lights except track signalling having been turned off. And everyone on the trains here that message and others, mostly warnings of "death to the interferers" being broadcast over the train PA systems, in a raspy, twisted voice, the type of voice associated with an escaped mental patient. Drastic measures are taken, the Yellow Line is cut in half, with a bus serving the three stations in between. However, pretty soon an entire section of the line, and seven stations, had to be closed, as the odd rocks were interfering with the third rail and sometimes causing the trains to act by themselves. The tunnels to the affected station were sealed shut.
A rather odd problem for a subway system to have. But there is more to the rocks than meets the eye.
Of course, Sayamura had no agencies or departments for dealing with the abnormal. So there happened to only be one solution. Call the Cat.

Elsewhere...

"This isn't the story is it? I'm lost... and not sober... and the theives stole my wallet, so I don't remember who I am... Oh... wait here it is. appearantly I'm a 3rd time convicted Argentinan Nationalist, and I live with 3 other guys for some reason. This one likes to get burnt by cigarettes. Here is a picture of my car... I guess it's name is Unlicensed Taxi. Stupid name for a car."

Who?

On to someone else...
His past is mysterious, but maybe that helped draw him to Cat. His original name is Pieruru, but he has the code name of Star-Hunter. He is not human but of a race that is pretty similar, except for pointed ears. What little is known about his past is that he was a member of the "star tribe" and a great warrior, and he knew all matters of stealth and sneaking. However, both his two sisters, and then his girlfriend, were abducted by some "mysterious force" that it's too painful to talk about, and then he was somehow zapped from his homeworld to here, due to numerous conditions including an overloading Rotary Converter and the moons of both worlds being aligned in a way that provides the only accurate answer to a complex mathematic equation that is theoretically unsolvable.
He has slightly darkish skin, pointed ears, and long hair. At home he prefers dressing as he did where he came from, wearing several ceremonial necklaces and a cloth sarong (wrap-around skirt) and sandals, but sometimes when duty calls, he wears camouflage. He has all kinds of weird abilities, mostly accute hearing and possibly telepathy, that he does not fully comprehend.
He enjoys attacking the evil, especially that which is abnormal, because he believes that whoever it is he's against at the moment is somehow connected to his sisters and his girlfriend. As a result, he can sometimes be too zealous. He really likes rock and some metal and some jazz and rap, but he hates the Rolling Stones and Eminem, as he believes that somehow Mick Jagger and Marshal Mathers are connected to the "dissapearences". He also dislikes road-rage idiots, as well as those who not only use cellphones, but have an overwhelming desire to let everyone know they have, and are using, one. He also hates door-to-door proselytizers with a passion (The "Join my religion or you go to the Earth's Core" type people). He has an affinity towards cats, which may explain why he joined this particular outfit, then again, maybe it won't.
He picked up the phrase "Time to Rock and Roll", and uses it a little too often. He likes pinapple, spinach, and octopus on his pizza. He also likes Slice, which is a soft drink not that common ("Either you have it or you don't!") He can sometimes be sentimental, sometimes short-tempered, but is quite reliable.

Cat was fresh out of college, mostly paid by his parents. Who, by the way, were still in the dark about his friends and what they had done together. He had to put his crazy life on hold while he went away to college. It took up way to much of his time, and his rubber band pen had become a distant memory... Not a fond one. Sure, those "were way past cool" times, but thinking about such had to be prevented... He always had a soft spot for yearning for the past. After a long time, it sunk in that it was probably better to remember the friends but not ever to attempt that life again.

Anyway, Cat's job, working at the local World Video Game, wasn't exactly what he was aiming for in life. He wanted to become a Sunday-morning-paper comic strip artist, and that--probably just like every other job--was not waiting for you as soon as you stepped outside of your school after four years of hard study. At least he had a steady apartment...

He decided to take a walk. The local park wasn't too far. Then this strange man came into view. He looked confused.

"I beg your pardon, son," the Man said. "I'm a little lost... Could you give me the Date and Location."

"Well.. that is an odd request... Okay, though. The year is 2008 and the location is northern Maryland..."

"Thank you. I seem to be suffering from Amnesia."

"...?"

"Exactly. I don't remember who I am... or where I came from. But I know that I am supposed to be doing something important..."

"Well... I've got an apartment... you can use the couch."

Our heroes continue to the Dingy Apts.

"You know... you look might fimilar... like we've met somewhere long ago."

"So tell me, what is the last thing you remember?"

"I remember someone who looks like me shoving me into some lava... Instead of hitting the lava, I find myself falling 8 ft. to the ground in a dumpster..."

"That is an odd story... but why would you be near lava and suddenly fall into dumpster?"

"I don't know..."

"Anything else you remember?"

"Yeah... me telling my daughter to protect my wife and hold down the fort... and YOU! YOu are there... at least he looks like you..."

"Ah! the Nostalgia."

Unknown to either of the two heroes, the man is not National. He is a Superhero from another dimension. For the sake of the story, you won't be told who he is yet.

"Sounds a little strange....but then again, I've been a magnet for the abnormal. Why can't I just attract telemarketers who call at ungodly hours, like everyone else?"

The man simply nodded his head in agreement...
"So who are you, may I ask?"

"They call me the Cat!" replied Cat, "although I have a rather interesting past too, yet I have yet to fall into lava, maybe I should put that on my to-do list!"

The two men laughed in unison.

Just then a figure ran by one of the apartment windows.

"Oh, don't mind him, he's the resident oddball, or would be, if not for me....oh, and that guy Lester from New Haven who always speaks railroad-ease, and the girl who thinks she's a J-pop singer when there ain't a drop of Japanese blood in her and she can't pronounce any word other than Sayanara properly...and the Elvis impersonator. But anyways, he likes to dress like he's from the south pacific and lie on the roof."

"That's interesting!" commented the man...."Now if only I knew who I was!"

Cat put on the TV, which was a rather shabby 13 incher with its "rabbit-ears" held in place by chewing gum and duct-tape. It wasn't anything that interesting, mostly complete morons smashing each other with chairs on national television. Suddenly, the host of the show, who was mostly doing nothing, was suddenly saying something about "blue stones, blue stones"

"I think I vaguely remember someone with a saphire obsession" said the man, "YOU DID! I mean.....the you who looks like you.....ok, you know what I mean!"

"Ok, can you tell me about whoever it was who pushed you into the lava?" asked Cat.

"it looked exactly like me!" said the man, "but it wasn't!" Just then there was a knock on the window. Cat walked to it, and the dark figure, who was revealed to just have dark skin, and only wearing a sarong (wrap-around skirt) and a bone necklace, came in.

"How's the roof?" asked Cat, "And why didn't you use the door? And why you dressed like that? And who put the bop in the bop-she-bop-she-bop?"

"Just I....Pieruru is my name.....ok, call me Pete......or call me anything else you want, just NOT Eminem or any one of the Rolling Stones....unless one of them is named Pete! I couldn't help notice your talk about...(cue dramatic cords)...ABNORMALITIES!"

"I guess!" said the Man, "Hey, I ran into you.....before.....I think!"

"I think I met you before!" commented Pete, "I also think I met Leonard Cohen, but I'm not sure!" Just then, strange ranting was heard from the streets below....mostly imcomprehensable rambling.....with laughs.....and a few words....
Also, wind was suddenly blowing outside, and the weather abruptly changed!

"This was... This IS just like my memory! I just know... Or feel." the man stuttered.

The Cat looked about. "Who said that?!"

"Said what?" Replied the man.

Pete answered with "'Death to the interferers...' Don't you hear it too?"

Soon the man was hearing the staccato voices, too.

"I have the strangest feeling," commented Cat in a nearly wistful tone, "something about Afava'a... They must... The Afava'a..."

"Well...," said the man, "Before we go on some dadblamed adventure, I'll need a name."

Cat, "How about Jim?".

"No", retorted the man.

"Eugene?" asked Pete.

The Man looks out the window, across the street at the All you can eat buffet.

"Al", said the man "Call me Al"

The next minute Cat was out the door muttering something about the Afava'a. When Pete or Al would try to stop him or ask him anything, he would shove them off.

"Is he in a bad mood or what?" suggested Al.

Pete replied with "Yes, I believe so." "Afava'a? I wonder what that is..."

"Well... he seems to know what it is."

"~brrvzt~ NF, come in. He followed you... ~brrvzt~ comeon dad, answer me." said a strange voice.

"What the..." wondered Al.

"The voice is coming from your butt," Pete explained.

Al reaches to his pants pocket and finds something that he hadn't noticed, a GameBoy Com.

"Who is this?" asked Al.

"Don't you ~brrvzt~mber me? We ~brrvzt~ouht you were ~brrvzt~ dead."

"Why are you talking to me?"

"Bull follo~brrvzt~ you i~brrvzt~ the port~brrvzt~."

"~brrvzt~mit, NF, we don'~brrvzt~ have time ~brrvzt~ this yo~brrvzt~ must find Gol... [various crashing sounds and screaming] ~pewzoom~"

The GameBoy Com went dead.

"Hello, hello?"

"I wonder what they meant by Gol?" piped up Pete.

"If we had a way of finding out..."

"Come with me, we'll go to the Cyber Café. You can find anything you want."

At the café...

"The Government online isn't any help." Al bluntly said.

"~brrvzt~Dad, Bull ~brrvzt~ay have ~brrvzt~llowed you, but ~brrvzt~ his dron~brrvzt~ven't. You mus~brrvzt~ find Golem." The voice was back.

"Why do I need a statue?" responded Al.

"No, ~brrvzt~lem is a Per~brrvzt~n! A person"

"Okay, I'll search for Golem."

Pete knew who Golem was. "Why bother? You may not know this, but he is Cat."

"He did say he was a magnet for the weird."

"I'm putti~brrvzt~ myse~brrvzt~ danger contac~brrvzt~ing you. ~brrvzt~Please hurry."

"Tell me you name!"

"Enthree..."

Who is this Enthree? Is Golem in anyway willing to help whese people? More importantly, will this Bull character destroy our heroes before they can help Enthree?

Pete, or rather Pieruru, then said "I think it's time to rock and roll!"

"Hold on there, we don't even know what to do. At least I don't, my memory has more holes than swiss cheese and a B movie plot combined!" said Al, "And now I find out I have this communicator disguised as a portable videogame system!"

"Where are you from, anyways?" asked Pete. Al gave the explanation he gave Cat.

"And you?" asked Al, "Personally, I want to know the reason for your pointed ears, and your "tropical island chic" choice of clothing, no guys up here wear those wrap-around sarong skirts, at least, I don't think so..." Pete gave the explanation that may have been associated with Pieruru before, including the freak accident that somehow sent him to Earth.

"LIKE GOING FROM LAVA TO A DUMPSTER!" shouted Al in surprise.

"So we're both not from here? I guess we're brothers!" mused Pete. "Anyways, we have to find Cat, he's gone off most likely, and I think I know where!"

"And where would that be?" asked Al.

"MacArthur Park!" replied Pieruru. "But I'm not that good at cat-hunting, never was. However, my name means Star-Hunter.......but call me Pete if it works better for you! We'll rock and roll, but first...."

"But first what?" asked Al, "You heard Enthree, Bull may be after us, and what about this Afava'a?"

"I need a Slice!" retorted Pieruru, "Either I have it or I don't. But we can drink on the way there, we're right. There may be some evil that needs stomping out. They took two who meant much to me in my old life, on the other world, and they won't get me!"

"You don't even know who Afava'a is, and I don't know who Bull is, except Enthree said it's bad!"

The two soon headed to McArthur Park. Surely enough Cat was waiting there, sitting on a park bench. His eyes lacked expression. Suddenly the sounds of motorcycles could be heard coming from all directions, and they were all zooming in on the park. Cat wasn't paying any attention to anything or anyone.

"So what do we do?" asked Pieruru.

"No idea, except.....that.....future events will effect us in the future!"

The two walked up to Cat.

"I've decided I will join the Starway cult..."

"Whay?" replied Al with an almost anime face.

Pieruru was just as startled, if not more. "Why?!" Then it hit him. It was almost as if one of Cat's old storries came true!

"Why?" asked Al, as if to back Pieruru up.

Cat gave a response, his face as emotionless as ever. "Come with me, be happy."

Our heroes travel to a place where everything seems to be blue.

"This.. is cre..epy," stammered Al.

"I understand what you say." responded Pieruru.

"Mr. Carpainter doesn't just meet anyone." said Cat. "He though I was valueable, and he thinks you two are too!"

"Do you think this Carpainter is working for Bull?" Asked Al

"I don't know, but it seems as if Ness didn't teach him his lesson!" replied Pieruru.

"Ness?"

"He is a video game hero. I know it sounds weird, but I think that maybe this Carpainter isn't from this dimension either!"

They finally made it to Mr. Carpainter.

"Welcome to the Starway Cult, formerly known as the Cult of Happy-Happism. You must only wear Blue, all non-Blue colors are evil." said Mr. Carpainter.

"You're cracked," Said Al.

"You can join my cult, or I'll have to destroy you!"

"Let's fight him! Ready guys?" asked Pieruru.

"You know it!" said Al.

"Cat?"

"You're too late! I have control of his mind!"

"Grrr..." muttered Al and Pieruru.

Could a video game villian really appear in the real world? How did he take control of Cat? Will the poster of this post ever understand what's going on? The astounding answers when we return.

Al and Pieruru made a beeline towards Mr. Carpainter, but Cat got in their way and kicked them backwards with a well executed roundhouse. "Insolent Worms!" shouted Cat in a monotone voice, "You have no idea of Happy-Happiness, you are all pigs, and we shall dine on bacon!" "Try that on me again!" shouted Al. Cat obliged and charged him, and Al executed a perfect judo throw on him. Pieruru, meanwhile, was going after Mr. Carpainter. They began with exchanging punches, and then Pieruru tried the bluff "your shoelaces are untied", because he saw it on TV, but Mr. Carpainter just retorted "fool, I wear LOAFERS!" To that Pieruru tried stomping on his feet. "Hey, don't you dare step on my blue suede shoes!"
"At least you don't want everything painted BLACK, you creep!" yelled Pieruru, as he tried applying a chokehold, but Mr. Carpainter took out a small nightstick and whacked Pieruru off of him, and then threw him against a wall. Al was having a hard time against Cat, because he seemed imune to pain in the state he was in. Nothing short of knocking him out would have any effect. Cat just smiled as he picked up Al and pile-drove him, but Al was mobile enough to role out of the way of any follow-ups.
Pieruru was slumped against a wall, his legs spread out on the floor, his sarong in such a way that his legs were exposed to the thighs and he was worried that perhaps someone would see something they shouldnt'. But then he realized that the only thing that mattered now was defeating Mr. Carpainter. He heard of him and his sick twisted cult. And he wouldn't be surprised if he was behind his sister and his girlfriend dissapearing. "YOGOGIYOG!" yelled Pieruru, which in his native language was one of the worst insults you could deliver. He rushed forward far more quickly than he had ever run, crashing into Mr. Carpainter like a charging locomotive. Mr Carpainter grinned and then his fists began glowing blue, and he smashed Pieruru hard and sent him sprawling.
"I don't know exactly who you are, jungle boy, but thank you for letting me make an example of you, so that all will know the way of the Starway of Happy-Happism! If you were a little tougher, on the right side, and dyed that warp-around skirt of yours blue, or even indigo, then you could be my bodyguard."
"STAR-LEVELING FLARE!" yelled Pieruru, as he held out his hands, and began to glow. The room was filled with an orange glow.
"What's going on?" asked Mr. Carpainter. Just then an orange star-shaped projectile appeared, in front of Pieruru, and it smashed into Carpainter, shocking and burning him. All of the sudden Cat shook and then came to his senses.
"Man, I had a bad dream...where am I? And what's the deal with the burning man?"
"Long story!" uttered Al.
"He's getting away!" yelled Pieruru. The three goodguys chased Mr. Carpainter down a long blue corridor, and then through a hidden door. They came upon a stainless steel self-propelled Rail Diesel Car (basicly a stainless steel railcar with a funny metal hump on top for the exhaust and radiator and bell, the engines underneath where the passengers sit, and no need for a locomotive to haul it). Of course, this car was painted blue, and it had both a light blue "Smiley-Face" and numerous blue stars, and the word "Bull-Liner" written on it. It was parked on a train-track that led to a tunnel. Just outside the car were several women with long hair who were all wearing long flowing blue nightgowns. CarPainter yelled "Delta Blue", and the women all boarded the car, and one of them started the engines and began ringing the bells. CarPainter jumped up the steps into one of the doors that were at either end, and the doors were closed, and the car started. The trio of goodguys tried opening one of the doors but coudln't, and the one-car train sped off into the tunnel, that was sloped downwards, and just then several heavy doors slammed shut on the track, preventing pursuit.

"Just great!" commented Al, "So what do we do now?"
"SOMETHING!" replied Cat, attempting humor.

So, what is that "something", anyways?

Somewhere else...

"Did you get the Nintenfreak?!" ssked a booming voice.

"*gulp* no sir..." responded Mr. Carpainter.

"Do you still have Golem under your control?"

"No, they broke the spell I put on Cat."

"DID YOU EVEN USE YOUR LIGHTNING POWER?"

"Sir, I haven't been about to use Lightning Power ever since I got rid of my Mani Mani Statue."

"*calms down* Are the others still in the Starway Cult?"

"Yes, the power of Blue Blue has corrupted them. Soon their souls will be ready for harvesting!"

"You realise that since I'm only half a person, I need Nintenfreak to complete the transformation, and Golem's soul to complete the transformation?"

"Yes, you've said it before."

"Don't fail me again, or I'll have no choice to send you back, and destroy you!"

Back at Cat's appartment, Al took out his Gameboy Com and re-established contact with Enthree.
"Good y-- got the Go-- Now listen $#@!%#@ impor$@$~~~ you must ~~!!@##!@$ @$!@# #@!@#@!# Is this thing even working? !!!!!!va'a? More impo!#!#!#!# This is hopeless, just stop the Bull!"
"Yes Enthree!" said Al.
"Hopefully you'll soon @#!%@ actually are! Remember, find !@!#!$!@$enFreak!"

"Just great. I should have used my powers...but then again I haven't fully mastered them, but if I had, I could have destroyed that metal thing with the funny metal bubble on it!"

"BUDD RDC!" yelled a voice from behind the front door of the place, "Built by Budd in Pensylvania in the 50's, very reliable!"

"Oh, don't mind him, He's the train-guy from New Haven I warned you about!" said Cat, "These days he's trying to court the fake Japanese singer, with little success. Didn't I tell you this place is weird? But it's in a relatively good part of town and the rent is cheap, so you can't complain."

"So what's the plan?" asked Al, "And by the way, I think we need a nickname, as a team, what do you think, Cat and Pieruru?"

"How about SLICE, ROCK AND ROLL?" asked Pieruru.

"Keep that suggestion under your hat...wait, you don't have one...under your sarong then!" commented Cat, "How about "THE CATS?"

"Hmm, I have another idea!" suggested Al.

Just then the TV, which was on but changed to a rather bland channel, had a special news bulletin. A map of the world was shone, with several blue dots.

They watched.

"The blue stones have appeared in these areas," said a reporter. They were all very scattered. "No one has any idea what they mean or why they are there. Scientists are pooling together. More as it comes to us.
In other news, the leader of Starway cults made a speech today. If you missed it, it will air tonight at 8 PM. Be sure to watch WJZ 13."

Pieruru knew what to do. "We'll go down to the library. Guys, after I find the Starway Cult's location, you go try to infiltrate Starway Cult by becoming members, don't forget the blue. Meanwhile, I'll be looking up in a telephone book anyone who might be able to help us. Whatever you do, don't let them get to your mind. Who knows if he takes over the minds of people who join, and if the effects last forever..."

Cat wasn't very good at being aloof in those sort of situations such as being in a cult around everyone... "Shouldn't we all try to research together and get as much information as possible before going in?"

"We don't know how much time we've got," Al pointed out.

Pieruru was opening the door. "I guess it's a go!"

The following has been taken from a Newspaper Article in the Library

Twoson Times. 25˘ 1995

Prodigy Paula Kidnapped.

Earlier today, Insane Cultist under the Lead of Mr. Blue Carpainter kidnapped young Paula of Polestar Preschool. The young prodigy has the ability to use PSI. Mr. Carpainter's intentions are unknown at this time

Twoson Times. 25˘ 1995

Hero Ness Saves Paula. Carpainter Forced into Hiding

Young hero Ness of Onett saved Paula earlier today from Mr. Carpainter. Carpainter claims that his Mani Mani statue told him to do kidnap Paula. Mr. Carpainter could not be reached for questioning.

Sayamura Gazette. 50˘ 2007 New Cult Introudes Upon Fair Citizens of Sayamura A new cult called the Starway Cult has made it's presence known. This, truly evil cult, that promices Happiness by painting everything Blue. This Cult are the remains of the cult of Happy-Happism. Their Leader, Blue Carpainter is said to posses control of Lightning. Anyone thinking of defying Mr. Carpainter might want to consider buying a Franklin Badge.

Elsewhere...

Says the Hotel Owner, "I'm glad you've considered to join our cult. Don't forget to say your Blue-Blue Prayer before you go to sleep."

Back to our heroes....

Cat led them to an abandoned wharehouse, "I have something in here I saved for just such an occasion. I was hopeing it wouldn't come to this!"

"What is it?" asked Al.

"Hold on!" warned Pieruru, "Stones...and I don't mean Jagger's group!" There was a circle of suspicious blue stones that were suddenly glowing white. A bright flash filled the air and weird noises were heard, and just then a woman, about 5'1" high, with darkish skin, long black hair, and in a dark blue flannel nightgown with light blue stars on it.

"I am one of the shining ones!" said the woman, and she appeared to hover slightly above the ground, "Join the StarWay, there is one way, and it is Blue!" She then floated off, "I must help my sisters, if you want the Path, the way is to the Gainsborough Station! Praises to the Eternal Afava'a, and to his Messengers who are the shepherds!"

"I know that place!" said Cat to his friends, "no thanks to the train guy who blabs on about it. Only a few trains stop there, most stop at Union on the other side of town. Gainsborough is mostly used by factory workers out at the Steelworks and Fishworks complexes, and it's also used for the friday and saturday night Disco Trains. Anyways, we have a wharehouse to enter." Entered they did, and inside was a pile of crates in one corner. Cat, Al, and Pieruru removed them, and there was a really modified Jeep. "It's the Catmobile. Has GPS, all kinds of bells, whistles, and weapons, and four-wheel drive. We can use its gadgetry to find things to help us!" He started it, and he saw that the radar was picking up blue stone locations in the city. "Yes, I am a weirdness magnet!" complained Cat. "First stop, to a clothes store for some BLUE stuff!" They drove to Al's Duds, a swanky upscale clothes store, where Al and Cat got blue pants, blue shirts, and blue jackets. Pieruru just got his hands on special dye to ensure his sarong was dyed blue, and just in case he needed it, he also got a blue camoflage suit.
"Before we go into the tiger's mouth, do you have any suggestions?" asked Al.
"Actually, yes!" said Pieruru, "I can sense weird disturbances. All of their teleporting and those blue rocks beaconing is having side-effects that may help us. I sense that someone from one of the many other *spaces* has been teleported in, to a building not to far from the train station I think.
Al checked his Gameboy Com.
"Can't say name ~~~~~ code~~~~ Beautiful Grey Eyes, Middle ~~~~ Narcisiss flow~, Blue ~~~~, Long Blue ~~~~, Enlight~~~" "That just helps!" commented Cat, "who would that be?"
"Maybe SCHALA?" suggested Pieruru. They entered the building suggested, a hotel, and the magement was at the front complaining about a woman with blue hair in a purple dress who suddenly appeared on a couch in a hallway.
"We'll take her off of you!" said Al.
"Thank goodness, she was scaring away customers!" said one of the management. They found Schala, fast asleep, and tried waking her up. They couldn't. So they took her to the Catmobile and put her in the back seat. They tried waking her up the best way they knew how....turned the radio to a bad station and turned up the volume. She was up.
"Where is Janus, is Lavos....WHERE AM I?" asked Schala. The group gave her a rundown on what was running down.
"You're strong willed, so we need you to help infiltrate the Cult of Starway! We have to go to the train station!" The way there they had to explain to her just what a train station is, and the concept of "rail vehicles." At the sation, a rather grimy looking white building with greek columns and wide open doors, a carnival barker in blue was shouting "Step right up, step in, Platform 9, come witness the true path of Happy-Happism, Happy-Happism, The StarWay, Happy-Happism, the Truth, Happy-Happism, Platform Number Nine, Ask the Mole-King for details, No Ticket required, just your undivided devotion, Mothers bring your sons, Fathers bring your daughters, Everyone bring their blue, the future is blue. there were also a few "Shinning Ones" (those women in nightgowns who were slightly floating), most of them holding up signs of the virtues of the Path. Numerous people were walking in, some of them quite eagerly, others in zombie-like patterns. The group of four all entered the building. Numerous posters were set up, and at the ticket counter, instead of the normal agent, there was the Mole King, from Marvel Land (old NAMCO game), holding a hammer in one hand and a megaphone in the other. He had brown fur but was wearing a blue robe. He was barking information through the megaphone, "I am one of the loyal servants of the path, follow the path, Platform Number Nine, Our Leader wants you all to be saved, bring blue, bring all the blue!" He then noticed the group, "YOU THERE, you look like loyal subjects, I even liked that one of you dyed her hair for the cause. Platform Number Nine, trains leave every few minutes!" At one end of the room, across from the ticket counters, were numerous doors, each of them with a pyramid-shaped white pyramid above the door with a number on it. Pyramid number 4 flashed as the doors swung open and numerous people ran out. Pyramid number 9 was solid, and that was a door into which numerous people were being led, the solid sound of footsteps echoing through the room. Numerous Shining Ones were present, as were some railroad police from the Janesville, Oklahoma, Kalamazoo and Eerie railroad (or JOKE for short). They were in arguments and even fights with the shining ones, "Hey, you have no right to park those trains here, you maniacs!" shouted one of them. But a few of them were suddenly walking backwards as if compelled by force.
"Pay no attention to those twerps, they will soon see the way of Blue!" The group of good guys got into line and began marching through the door, with Shining Ones and a few men in blue police-like uniforms standing on either side. Through the door was the platform area, only two trains parked, one locomotive and five cars at track 4, and a trio of "Bull-Liner" RDCs in Starway colors (read "shades of blue") at track 9. Everyone was being led aboard. Suddenly the line stopped, and the train started, its diesel engines all roaring to life. That train left, but a few moments later another Bull-liner train, this one four cars long, appeared at track 10.
"This is it!" thought Pieruru, speaking psychicly to avoid arousing suspicion.
"We better not fail," replied Schala, "or a fate worse than Lavos will happen!"

Later...

"Stay with and act like the zombies, guys." Pieruru warned through mind power to the others. This way they might escape becoming zombies. "By the way, I've opened a mind link between us. You won't hear each other's EVERY thought, but when you want to it'll happen."

The train zoomed on... our heroes were almost dizzy with blue.

Cat was wondering to himself why they had trusted this "Schala" person so blindly.

The train stopped by a blue pyramid structure.

Cat was recalling a cheezy show he had seen the other night. "You know, they say aliens somehow built the pyramids and used them to communicate with us..."


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