Written by: The Gamehiker, Ditto McCloaker, Luigi of the Pipes, Luigigamer Golem, Sapphire, and Yoshiman Ditto: Okay, so, what's this 'Fourth' part of the Afterlife, then? *strokes Good, Evil, and Neutral Guisseppie* I noticed i still can't get him to work...

X: The fourth piece is in...

*everyone stares on*

*all three Golems fall asleep*

X: ...Weirdamonium!

~everyone gasps~

Luigi: W- Weirdamonium? What's that?

Zero: It's where the insane go when they die. It's the final resting place of the WEIRD, the eccentric, the erratic, the-

*gets fwapped by X*

Elzie: But... how do we get THERE?

Vorpal: I'd say this story is pretty weird, so that has to be a start...

~at that exact moment...~

Voice: WHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...!

*a giant safe falls on top of the crowd. When they come to... they are in a VERY strange place...*

PG7 Golem: *crawling out of safe wreckage* Ow. Whoa. O.O Where ARE we?

*everyone else crawls out*

Voice: You are in Weirdamonium. As guests, actually, courtesty of someone else...

*as everyone looks around, one more person emerges from the wreckage... it is Oddball Mario and his rocket-powered camel, Speedy, who had been riding the falling safe like a cowboy*

Vorpal: Whoa, are those fish swimming in mid-air?

Masa: Yikes. Pink elephants!

Saph: A green sub. Cool.

Ditto: Hm... *looks around for Guisseppie*

PG17 Golem: Oooo.

PG7 Golem: If only DVGBC were here to see THIS...

PG17 Golem: Cool...
I mean, this STILL doesn't explain why someone good (albeit weird) is helping these evil dudes. Now, um, if only I could find my way around...

Narrator: While everybody else is searching for directions to the guy in charge, PG7 Golem finds a sign on a wall...

PG7 Golem: "Big Cheese This Way. ^ "
Well, how do I go up a wall? Or... ~jumps onto wall so that he is standing sideways~

Meanwhile...

X ~watching out a window~: ~snicker~ They'll fall right into our trap.

Zero: The pie, the balloons, Everything's classic...

Vectorman: Plot twists in Weirdamonium are cool...

Yoshiman: Wow! What other kind of weird things happen in Weirdamonium?

Fuzzball: I know! I'll shoot Vorpal in the foot!

Vorpals: Who?

*Fuzzball draws a heavy machine gun and blasts away at all the Vorpal's feet*

Vorpals: AAAAAAGH!

PG12Vorpal: Hey, cool! We're floating off the ground without any feet!

Yoshiman: *Grabs text and hits PG10Vorpal on the head with it.* Hehehe. . .

Ditto: Hey, we can't stand around here all day!

Vorpals: We're not.

Ditto: Or float. Whatever.

Vorpals: *snap fingers in semi-unison*

Ditto: Okay, Almighty Cod. I'm looking for the Weird part of my magical ? Block. Can I just HAVE it?

Cod: Oh, sure. It's over there. *indicates a block bouncing around with big funny teeth and a tongue hanging out*

0000 ~Ditto runs after the 3rd piece of the block~

*at the moment, everything around them rocks violently, getting everyone's, including the Weirdamonium inhabitant's, attention*

Yoshiman: Mein Gott! What was THAT?

*Walt Whitman appears*

Walt: Heads under your desks, kids! Some serious bad stuff is goin' down in the Afterlife!

Golem PG17: What's the problem?

Walt: Some rogue angels snuck into Heaven through the Angel's Entrance, and are causing some serious...

Golem: Holy crap!

Walt: Exactly.

*Ditto grabs the Weird Guisseppie and joins everyone as they stand outside the gates of Heaven*

Vorpals: *slamming their fists into their palms in semi-unison* We can't let that happen! There's 'fun evil' and then there's the kind of evil ya just don't do.

Masamune: How does something like this happen?

*at this moment, a Japanese dragon on a white puffy cloud floats up*

Yoshiman: Who are YOU?

Dragon: The only way to get in through the Angel's Entrance is to look like a normal angel. Interestingly, they all looked like the same angel. Almost... video gamey.

Ditto: *realization comes to his eyes* I know who they are! It's all our arch-enemies! They must have used their Guisseppie piece to turn themselves into Pit, from Kid Icarus!

Saph: But that's crazy. They couldn't have fooled God, could they? In any case, why isn't He doing anything about this?

Dragon: God works in mysterious ways. You never know. He may be.

Ditto: Let's go in and... stop them!

Vorpals: Follow us! We know how to get into the Big House!

Dragon: Not with those evil cursed demon swords, you ain't.

Vorpal 3: Hey, what are you talking about? Masamune went in there?

Dragon: Yeah, but he's been a veritable BOY scout in the series lately.

Current Vorpal: Oh, CRUD. Okay... we'lll just... wait out here, I guess.

~The rest of the heroes go in, and are immediately captured~

Vorpals: Oh, CRICKEY. *slaps themselves in the foreheads* Well, looks like it's up to us!

Vorpal 3: What about our swords?

Most Current Vorpal: *unstrapping his* We'll just go in BARE-FISTED!

Vorpals: YEAH!!! *they all unstrap theirs, and go for the gates, but they still don't open*

Vorpal: Huh?

Dark Ditto: *in Pit form* ~peeking over the gates~ HA! FORGET IT! You still don't qualify!

MCV: But... we're good now!

Dark Ditto: You're RICH, aren't you?

MCV: What does... hey, wait a second!

DD: HAH! You know the rules. NO RICH PEOPLE IN HEAVEN!

Vorpal: So THAT'S how they're messing everything up... irresponsible and malicious misuse of Scripture!

DD: That's riiiight! The OLDEST trick in the book. Learned it from Tourquemada (of the Spanish Inquistion) himself down in Heck!

Vorpal: What do we DO? BIG GUY, WHAT CAN I DO?

*the Dragon floats up*

Dragon: It is easier for a camel to pass through a needle than for a rich person to enter the gates of Heaven... but it can still happen, if his intentions are good.

MCV: *thinks* Hey... WAIT a second...!

Dragon: Hmmm...?

MCV: That's IT! *reaches back into Weirdamonium and pulls out Speedy the Rocket-Powered Camel*

Dragon: Got any ideas?

MCV: Yup. Hey, can you give me a knitting needle?

Dragon: Sure thing. *pulls out a needle from the little black bun on his head*

~elaborately, Vorpal sets the needle up a hundred miles away, and then leads Speedy a hundred miles back in the OPPOSITE direction~

Vorpal: Alright... ready? Steady...?

Speedy: *spits*

Vorpal: And.... GO! *sets the switch on Speedy's rocket pack for 'Light Speed' and turns it on*

Speedy: O_o

~BAZZZZZZZZZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~

*within an instant, Speedy is suddenly found to be a hundred miles on the OPPOSITE side of the knitting needle, with a VERY surprised look on his face. Smoke curls out of his now fuel-less rocket pack. The gates of Heaven swing open*

Dragon: Nice trick.

Vorpal: YES! I learned in Physics class that, an object traveling at the speed of light shrinks to a mass of 0. Of course, since this is the afterlife, nothing bad can happen to him, so he just became the first camel to pass through the eye of a needle! HA!

Dragon: Impressive. Now, get in there.

~all the Vorpal's march in, triumphantly, except the Most Current one, who hangs back a sec~

Vorpal: Hey, who are you anyway?

*looks around and the dragon is gone*

*All struggle in bonds as they are led back to the Hellevator.*

Metal Mario: Now to simply taint you all with evil, kill you, and give you a free ride on this nifty elevator.

Present Golem: You can't do this! We shall not burn!

MM: You'd rather pay the fee on the Hellevator?

PG: You're missing the point!

Ditto: Wouldn't it be rather difficult to bring anything of evil caliber into Heaven, considering Satan's banishment?

MM: Shut up! All of you, get in the Hellevator.

*All crowd in*

Arab Dude: *skims through pages of Bible* Aha! "But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who curse you, and pray for those who mistreat you." Bladda bladda bladda...

MM: Ha ha! We just have to do bad to them, and prevent them from doing good to us. Instant tainting.

Ditto: Alright. Pray for them.

MM: Oh? Will you be praying, McCloaker, after I shove this popsicle down the back of your coat?! *does so*

Ditto: O.O Oh GEEEEEEZ that's cold!

MM: Or how about after Mysterious Silhouette covers Golem in CHOCOLATE SYRUP?!

*Mysterious Silhouette does so.*

Golem: -_- *drip*

MM: Or when Arab Dude blows that trumpet in Mr. Masamune's ear?!

*Arab Dude does so.*

Masa: o.o WHAT?!

MM: Or...

Luigi: Um, excuse me.

MM: Yes?

Luigi: Well, as you probably realized, we've never met. And as such, I don't believe I should be punished for the crimes of my new... well... "associates"...

Saph: Crimes?! Luigi...

MM: Keep going.

Luigi: If you release me, perhaps I could be persuaded to... *dun dun dun* EVIL! I'm quite susceptible to the stuff, y'know, being an immature Jedi with insufficient training and all.

MM: Hmm...

*Chibi-Devil slithers up onto MM's shoulders*

Chibi-Devil: Don't lisssten to him! He'sss bad newsss, I tell you!

*MM glances at Chibi-Devil, then smacks him off his shoulder.*

MM: Alright, let's just...

*One of the Vorpals smashes his sword hilt against MM's head, garnering a metallic echo. MM turns to face him, then gives him a quick kick to the stomach.*

Luigi: I wasn't responsible for him sneaking up behind you, honest!

MM: You distracted me.

Luigi: Well, I'm pretty far crammed back here. I can't see.

MM: Alright. Somebody untie the whiner!

Luigi: (heh heh heh...)

*Luigi's bonds get untied*

Luigi: Aha! Fooled you! *Takes out lightsaber. . . but it doesn't work* Wha?

MM: Fool! Don't you know that in heaven, God is the light, and there is none besides him? It's not like we've pressed the 'Down' button or anything yet.

Luigi: Do'h. *Gets knocked out*

Yoshiman: ARGH!

Ditto: Yoshiman, calm yourself. Don't you have your bible?

Yoshiman: That's not going to help now!

Ditto: The word of God is sharper than any two-edged sword!

Yoshiman: O_O *cuts bonds loose* Aha! *Slashes at Ditto's bonds*

Ditto: Good work! *bonds get cut, Ditto takes Bible from seemingly noplace*

MM, Arab Dude, MS: Uh-oh. . .

MM: QUICKPRESSTHEBUTTON!

Arab Dude: *hits the button* BWAHAHAHA! It IS COMPLETE!

Luigi: .................

Masa: (Heyguysjusttoletyouknowi'mstillhereok?)

Metal Mario: Now I have COMPLETE CONTROL of HEAVEN, HECK, PURGATORY, and WEIRDAMONIUM!

Ditto: Dang.

MS: Yes! Whenever someone says any of those words.... they'll have to pay us a dollar each time!

Vorpals: That's.... DESPICABLE!

Masa: I think it's kind of clever.

PG1 Golem: But... why!?

Metal Mario: I've seen in the future... Party Goers 8.... 9.... 10... all the way to 17, which we are in now. And where are we? WHERE!? Nowhere! I am a SIDEKICK to that VORPAL! This cannot be tolerated.... a Party Goers without me is like....

PG7 Golem: A Party Goers without MagiKoopa?

~everyone pauses for a minute~

PG7 Flutter: So much for a surprise visit and rescue.

Metal Mario: Wait a second.... what are you doing!?

Vorpals: *heads down* Our swords.... who art left in heck... awesome is their names...

Masa: I'm going to have to report you for Religous Mockery on that one...

Ditto: That's it....! *stands up in his cords, hops a few feet ahead, trips on PG17 Golem, lands on a plank, which catapults the tied up Guiseppies towards the Vorpals* All of you! Hit it together!

MM: NO! WAAAIIIT!!!!!!!!!

Vorpals: *all of them kick the bags of Guiseppies at the same time....*

Narrator Newbie: And look! They all fused into one Vorpal and one Guiseppie!

Narrator: .... Try to be less blunt.

VORPAL: Ha! Look at me now! I am ALMIGHTY VORPAL! Four (or was it five?) Vorpals all in one! *they pulls the Holy Bible Sowrd and point it towards Metal Mario and his gang*

~clapping~

VORPAL: Who?

Dark Ditto: Bravo.... bravo.... you have succeeded.

Yoshiman: ... what is this all about?

Dark Ditto: Don't you get it?

Ditto: .... so THAT'S what this all is.... this was merely a ruse to test our limits to see if we were worthy for some divine quest upon which you wish to send us so that we may stop some far worse evil than what you pretended to be *GAAAASP* and now we are the last hope before the Afterlife is bought out by Microsoft!

Masa: Zoinks, how did you get all that?

Ditto: Well... I started to suspect something when I saw the TASTS arrive in the middle of a perfectly harmless PG17 story... and then it started to make sense when I realized I had no recollection of Party Goers 8-16.... but it all came together when Metal Mario announced his money making plan and revenge on the Party Goers Future!

Elzie: Jinkies!

Luigi: So just who is Metal Mario... *walks up to him and pulls off his mask*

Everyone: BILL GATES!?

Bill Gates: Yes... and I would have gotten away with it too if not for you meddling Party Goers!

Dark Ditto: *rips off his own mask*

Luigi: SAINT PETER!?

St. Peter: Indeed. It is I.

Masa: Wait a second... this can't be right...

VORPAL: What do you mean?

Masa: We aren't in Heaven....

Sapphire: You mean...

Masa: WE NEVEER LEFT WEIRDAMONIUM!

*everything fades away, and they see the Japanese Dragon, only now with gills and such*

Dragon: So you figured it out.... that I am COD ALMIGHTY!

PG1 Golem: Can we just go to Vegas? >_<

Ditto: What is it you want?

Cod Almighty Dragon: What do I want? Then I shall tell you before I kill you in the Easily Escapeable Crushing Room of Death! My plan is...

Narrator: What will happen next? Why is the Dragon really a fish? Just what happened to Heaven? Will VORPAL ever get his sword? Is Masa really the Boy Scout he's cracked up to be? Will Mr. Predict ever get a mention? Does MagiKoopa plan to make a suprise entrance? Will Golem ever get his groove back? What happened to Rhyk? What-

Narr. Newbie: For the lovva... find out some of that and less on the next post of.... PARTY GOERS IN THE AFTERLIFE!

Cod Almighty Dragon: ..To inflict the entire world with weirdness!

Golem: Weirdness? Cool.

All: ....

Ditto: Yike. Well y'see, the only reason why we came here was to gather the pieces of Guissippe.

All: *nod*

CAD: Not that it's any of your business, anyway, meddlers!

Luigi: Uh....isn't the point of Heaven, Heck, Purgatory and Weirdamonium to be the resting places of the souls that depart?

CAD: Yes.. but I plan to buy out the other three.

Masa: So you ARE Bill Gates!

CAD: Not quite, but I'll leave you to your own conclusions. Now, prepare to meet your doom!

Sapphire: If we're technically dead already, is there any point to killing us?

CAD: STOP TRYING TO BE LOGICAL!

All: ........

Masa: *mutters* Since it's obvious that we're dealing with the ILLOGICAL here.

Sapphire: That's it! If we are logical, we can get out of this situation.

Ditto: Or not...

VORPAL: Or not?

Ditto: Or not.

All: Huh?

CAD: While you all are trying to figure out yourselves, which will be DIFFICULT in this state, I say to you--accept the weirness-- and then I shall kill you in the Easily Escapeable Crushing Room of Death!

*locks them in the room*

Luigi: I guess that's a good sign.

Golems: We're still confused.

Ditto: There's no sense to thinking logically in this place.. so we'll have to think illogical. It's teh only way we can get Guissippe, which is the point.

Masa: But what about the CAD's plan to inflict the world with weirdness?

Ditto: Uh.. we'll figure out a way to deal with him later.

Elzie: Riiight.

Yoshiman: Uh.. well, first we'll figure out how to get out of here.

VORPAL: And get our swords....

Sapphire: How do you KEEP from going insane in a place like this? Does anyone got a plan around here?

Ditto: Well....
...There may be a way.

PG7 Golem: (Dang, now my newsstand isn't even making a whistle!)

Sapphire: Eh?

Ditto: ~a la Tails explaining the plan to Sonic and Amy aboard ARK in Sonic Adventure 2~ Not too long ago we learned that somehow some of us had gained or always had a seemingly latent "party energy." I'm guessing that maybe if we can kind of "channel" it into seriousness we can create a bubble of sustained seriousness...

Yoshiman: Like that girl from the Fantastic Four!

Sapphire: But wouldn't seriousness be banned?

Ditto: ~now like Sonic reaffirming plan~ But that's it! Wouldn't it be odd, or rather, weird, if seriousness came into Weirdamonium? And if we can lure the dragon in, it might dehabilitate or restrain his powers long enough for his grip to loosten. ~thrusts fist into open palm of other hand with a clapping sound~ That's when we can get inside the TASTS slash newsstand.

PG7 Golem: (Then stop Replaforce from screwing with PG1!)

Sapphire: *in sidekick voice* A- are you sure it will work?

Ditto: *in 1950's scientist voice* It has to, Miss Blue.... it HAS to... *dramatic close up of his eyes as he rips his glasses off dramatically*

Narrator: And with that, they all stood with their backs together, facing outward. Concentrating hard, they stuck their palms out and attempted to channel out their latent 'party' energy...

Elzie: It's WORKING, everyone! It's WORKING! Look!

Narrator: Indeed, greenish light began emitting outwards from their hands, and stretching up and around the group, closing up to form a green bubble of 'seriousness.'

Yoshiman: What's going to happen?

Masa: *now in scientific voice* Well, you know what happens to an air bubble inside soda?

Yoshiman: Hm...

*the bubble quivers and suddenly begins to float towards the portal out of Weirdamonium*

Dragon: Oh no you don't! *darts in front of the portal and opens his mouth wide*

~the bubble however, picks up speed as the Weirdness pressure becomes less and less, the closer it gets to the portal~

PG 7 Golem: Hold on everybody...!

Dragon: Huh...? O_o

~with lightning speed, the bubble shoots straight into the Dragon's mouth... and explodes through the tip of his tail on the other side, and gets expelled through the portal into the open seriousness of the afterlife with a resounding...~

*POP*

*the bubble arcs through the sky and lands out front of the Gates of Hebbin. The group, too shaken to maintain it, let it dissolve, and they all lie panting on the soft cloud, now free of Weirdamonium*

Present Golem: *hufflepuff* Wheee... WE MADE IT!

PG7 Golem: Now, we gotta activate the TASTS and set everything straight once and for all!

Present Golem: *patting pocket* And to get these plans from Gunpei Yokoi into the rightful hands...!

PG 7 Golem: ~opens up TASTS, steps half in~ --So will I be you?

Present Golem: ~opens up TASTS, steps half in~ I doubt it... I wasn't even you.

PG 7 Golem: Then how did I...?

PG Golem: ~eyes swirling~ This is all too confusing...

PG 7 Golem: And will he--err, I, remember this?

Present Golem: Good question. I think we ought to find out for ourselves.
Remember, believe in yourself...
Don't make the same mistake I did.

~Meanwhile, everyone has gone into their according TASTS~

PG 7 Golem, Present Golem: ^_^;

PG Golem: :(

Present Golem: Go kick some Replaforce tail.

PG 7 Golem: But if you aren't--~Present TASTS disappears~

Narrator: After a long time of pointless plot twists, somewhat good plot twists, some really good plot twists that were twisted into bad ones, and three bags of blueberry filled candy twisters - The Party Goers, Past and Future.... Future mostly, suddenly convene for no readily apparent reason...

Nar. Newbie: Except of course the fact PG8 has started and this needs to end....

Narrator: Quiet you! They convene at the diner in the mostly unknown fifth part of the afterlfie type place. Closely related to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe, they find theirselves dining at...

Nar. Newbie: "Joe's Diner"

*Guiseppie flies by the screen leaving a cloud of smoke reading, "Eat at Joe's" behind it*

------------------ Ditto: Well, it seems good that everthing is resolved now.

Masa: Yup, I even found the Pendant of Power!

Ditto: Huh?

Masa: *sniffle* Unmentioned side story thing...

Flutter: I'm just glad I have no nametag anymore!

Golem: That was getting confusing... time travel, going through the afterlife...

Yoshiman: Wiggy! Say, just which Golem ARE you? And what era of PG did we all decide to stay in?

Ditto: *cough* Well we got that cleared up.

Luigi: "We"?

Ditto: *sweatdrop* Heh heh.... well ya know how it was all confusing... there were questions about how we could keep a subtle continuity.. Frankly me, Masa, Vorpal, and others appeared earlier in the series than should be allowed. The fabric of time was on it's last thread, mathematicians were throwing their theories out the window - a window, I might add, was created through the manipulation of TASTS - and if that wasn't enough, Milliways almost went out of business because we made the end of the universe occur a few hours earlier than it was supposed to be....

Vorpal: Sounds like the usual, what did you do?

Ditto: I talked to God and he decided we'd start again after when PG7 was SUPPOSED to occur. But in the interest of being good, he's going to send Golem and Flutter back to their time and us back with them... erasing any memories of all of this.

Masa: o_o Meaning?

Ditto: Meaning that Party Goers 8 will occur and the insanity of this and the odd continuations of the last Party Goer stories will have absolutely NO relevance to PG8, but by means unknown to us, we'll have all already met eachother by then.

Vorpal: Whoa, can God do that?

Ditto: *covers eyes just as Vorpal is hit with lightning*

Vorpal: *coughs out smoke* Yeah... yeah, I guess he can.

Golem: So when do we end this story?

Ditto: Now, Narr. Newbie is all ready late for his voicing for Sheep in the Big City.

Golem: Yeah, but what about Replaforce?

Ditto: Actually-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Narrator: Now role that beautiful Credits Footage!

Producer: Steven Spellchecks

Director: George Wookie

That guy with the camera: Mario Mario

Cast, in order of memory -

Greg as Golem

Ordinary Man as the voice of Guiseppie

Moondo as Himself

The Real Evil McBoys as Masa (and Mune)

JeXXXXXXX as Ditto McCloaker

Boshi as the voice of the computer animated Yoshiman

Lady in Red as Sapphire

Harrison Ford as Vorpal the 64th

Girl who makes the Coffee as Elzie Ann

?????? as Luigi of the Pipes

Robert Stack as the voice of the Narrator

Ken Schatz as the Narrator Newbie

The local Chess Club Members as the cast of all those other characters we can't possibly be bothered to remember.

Casting set at OG Board, the Gamehikers

No fictional characters were hurt in the making of this OG, but the writers did suffer much verbal abuse.

Musical Score by Mozart. That's right, he made it in advance for us. Cool, huh?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~The Replaforce gang finally land in a destination in time, the crew step out in awe...~

X: What year is this?

Zero: 12,002

X: No.... NO! This can't be possible!

Zero: What is it!?

*X falls to knees yelling out at horror in front of a half buried Flying Submarine. As he is doing so several spiky haired, sword-toting men exit their police cars* and surround them

Narrator: Coming soon... The Replaforce Gang star in...

"PLANET OF THE HEROES"

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